A Black Journal

This black leather bound book is hidden in a secret compartment in a desk at Krynger Battlecat's house, where Elros is staying for the time being. There are many pages already filled in the book, but a spell has bound the pages together, preventing others from reading through it. Let it be known that it contains dark thoughts from a troubled mind, strategies, and small sketches amongt other things.

9th of Frostfall

A tiring day. Woke up from another nightmare. I'm not sure how much Krynger hears through his sleep, but he hasn't said anything so far. I got to my usual spot and painted another landscape. Mournhold; such a beautiful city. I'm hoping I can go back soon. Speaking of Mournhold, two Morag Tong agents are in town. Not a random occurrence why they're here, they're here to kill Ceylian. They will probably harm Elsynia to get to him. As much as I see them as daeljuhn, I cannot let anything happen to Elsy and Cey. I must plan around their plan, see if I can get them to back off. Maybe dopplegangers could help...I digress. I need to get away. Maybe some time by the shore at that place could help ease my mind.

Maybe I should just kill those two dunmer, it'd solve everything! Or help them if I'm such great friends with them. Too many choices, so much blood to spill. What to do, what to do.

I should meet with Elsy and Cey, tell them whats going on. But I need a plan first. Before I see them next, I will have one.

13th of Frostfall

The two Morag Tong assassins haven't been seen for a while now. Elsy and Cey are not around either. I hope I am not too late. I already have a plan set in motion. My contacts will tell me if the Morag Tong is done with their writ here. Until then, I will wait.

The town's people are quite uneasy around this Dar'athd Moonstorm. S'wit has been going around raising all kinds of hell. The other day, he ransacked Krynger's house looking for his beloved dagger, which I still have by the way, and then proceeded to attack and kill me. He even hurt Korvos and John. Gods, I want to snap that khajiit's neck! These kind of things just make it that much harder to fight the other side. I need help in this matter and so I asked for Bethany's help. She's already caught up in her own things, so helping me will come after she's done helping herself first. Its been months since I visited Moonshadow. I desperately need the Lady's help in this. But she won't answer my calls, nor my prayers. I've come this close to laying waste to the town and almost died because of it, but even then, nothing. I don't know if Lady Azura trusts me anymore.

Ah, what an impertinent fool you are. Fight the other side, rubbish. I am you, and you are me. Why do you keep pushing me away? Don't deny your instincts Elros, thats why everyone has been walking all over you. They think you're pushover, good for nothing attention seeking, self-loathing person. Calomel's treatment didn't do anything! Krynger even doubted you about Arquen! Why do you keep siding with these strangers, but not yourself?! You should know by now how much I have helped you, I only ask for one favor. Just one...

Damn this headache is the worst. I hate writing. I hate the fact that I need to ask someone else for help. I hate all this. I need to get away.