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Input on my Final short story for english before winter break will post full story soon if liked lol

3 posts · started by fireguy-746 on Dec 09, 2014 · 2216 views · in General Discussion
fireguy-746Dec 09, 2014
Dec 09, 2014 at 01:31 AM #1
before i begin this series of stories are basically chapters for a book assignment we got at the begining on the semester and ive been going on a long time so this is based on inspiration from the Fallout universe and battlefield series slightly. characters name come from series i personally enjoy the pacifc, band of brothers, and some war movies.

Background info: the year is 2019 and america and chinese relations are heavily strained by espionage and media scrutiny agents in china report a man by name of chang working with russian's to overthrow the Chinese leadership.
this was successful and the chinese leader was shot and killed (so they thought) chang framed the U.S. for the assassination and demanded retaliation. america's foreign diplomats try to calm the situation and clear the United States name. while this is happening china launches missle attacks on all United State bases in the china sea and south pacific. the diplomats are killed and american president Theodore Wilson addresses the nation (inspired by the December 7th speech) "yesterday Oct.28th 2019 america was suddenly and deliberately attacked by the armed forces of china. the attack was planned many weeks ago during the time in which the chinese government framed the United States for the death of the Chinese president. the attack yesterday in the south pacifc has caused mass damage to american forces in the south pacific i regret to announce that yesterday over 2 thousand american lives were lost. because of this atrocious attack from china i ask the congress declare a state of war." we invaded china stayed there a while they pushed us out and now begin an attack on the West coast.

assignment chapter now
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first sergeant Mason Thompson sitting in a foxhole with a private sage covered in a blanket and his winter clothing. the cold is like a knife on his cheek the cold is relentless. "hey sarge? why are we sitting here holding the line in Alaska anyway? shouldn't we be defending California or something?" sage asked sergeant Thompson which replied swiftly with, "well private, they knew how much we love the snow. so they sent us here to have fun." he chuckled some and looked at sage "ya cause i love freezing my ass off for my country sarge" replied sage. suddenly the sound of crunching snow hit thompsons ear he grabed his M416 and aimed in the direction of the sound and lieutenant nixon came from the dark and his figure approached the foxhole. "cold yet troops?" said nixon rubbing his hands together and trying to warm up. "yes sir cold as itll ever be." replied sage, mason sat down with his rifle in his lap "just watching the line sir" he said to nixon. "alright then keep up the good work and all." nixon continued his walk along the line checking on everybody on the line. 5:30am. artillery shells rang down on the line a medic t.j. roe was in his foxhole behind the line slightly he could hear the artillery and another soldier ran by his hole to the line "cmon doc! we gotta get on the line the Chinese are attacking!" doc roe moved out of his hole and started for the line. the artillery sounded like freight trains crashing into the earth and the ground moved like a volcanic eruption with each explosion. sage was shooting the machine gun with mason next to him firing from their foxhole. "how many of them are there!!" yelled sage to mason to which he replied "just keep shooting!!!" the line erupted in gunfire and screams the hole next to masons was nailed with a artillery shell killing the two men in it. as chinese tanks began to move into the open and toward the american line captain spears was on the radio calling in orders. "hit man actual this is hitman 2-1 we got heavy armor presence moving toward the line requesting a warthog run now!" he called on the radio. "hitman 2-1 this is actual your in luck we got 3 warthogs enrout now get the lines marked so they dont strafe our own guys." spears called out to his men to mark the lines with flares. moments into the fight the tanks were about a third of the way to the american lines when the strafeing run began and the chineses forces lost 7 tanks and fell back to there lines. the fighting at died down besides small firefights here and there along the line mason sat in his foxhole and got out his pip-boy to call his brother zack on video chat. "hey brother hows Washington?" asked mason when his brother answered "its cold just now snowing as bad as it is for you." replied zack "i saw emily today at the aid station (emily is his wife he met on a naval ship as a nurse) we got a number of wounded here but we are holding on." mason was suddenly called to a combat patrol to the chinese lines "good to hear bro, were about to see how far we can get moving forward instead of backward ill call ya later" the two hung up and zack put his pip-boy back in his backpack and returned to his line M39 in hand the chinese attacked twice that day. what the United States Air command did not know how ever was the chinese carriers off the coast were launching a huge wave of chinese bombers to attack the washington state line to make a hole for them to pour troops through. zack was miles out from the aid station when suddenly flashes began to appear out in the distance. the truck he was in sped up and arrived at the aid station in Seattle moments later to find the city was being carpet bombed. tripple A and SAM missles where being sent up into the air and the city was burning. the radio chatter sounded chaotic. "how the hell did the radar not catch these guys!" said the truck driver "get us to the aid station now!" said zack "we got orders to get to the line now ASAP zack we go by there you can see if your wifes okay then but we are not stoping!" said his commanding officer who was sitting in the front seat. zacks throat started to get a lump and he grew nervous. 12 minutes later the truck passed the aid station, the church they were using was caved in from being hit by a bomb the buildings around it in ruble and some a blaze the tripple A and explosions light the night. bombs still exploded all over the city. "get us out of here...." said zacks commanding officer "no..noo..noo..stop the truck let me out here!" zack said only to be told no by his commander "thats my wife!" he cried "we have orders zack! she could be dead or she could be alive we have to hold to the line!!" his commander yelled back at him. zack readied his gun the truck arrived in a gathering area with other troops and they all moved to the line. the chinese attack was in full swing zack crouched behind a tree and began to fire at the incoming chinese troops with many other american soldiers. "cmon your bastards!" zack shouted as he shot down 3 chinese soldiers. rage filled his head and tears ran down his face as he fought with his fellow soldiers. the United States launched numerous fighter jets to counter the chinese bombers sadly the didnt save Seattle but they stopped the bombers before the line could be destroyed. the sun came up and zack got a jeep and drove to the church. he came upon a scene of soldiers digging out survivors a figure sat on a box near sleeping from exhaustion. zack examined the figure and called out "emily!" the figure looked up and saw zack and took off running at him with tears. emily ran into zacks arms and they embrassed each other tightly (to be continued)
@rainhaDec 12, 2014
Dec 12, 2014 at 02:42 AM #2
I wish I was better on English to give you better input in this. But it seems good to me. Are you gonna have to write it on pen and paper? Or using pc?
fireguy-746Dec 12, 2014
Dec 12, 2014 at 05:35 AM #3
PC its written in word