KashyaAug 06, 2019Aug 06, 2019 at 06:38 AM
#1
Beside the clinic bed, Kashya's trademark satchel would lie beside it, filled with an assortment of things. Oranges lined one pocket, as well as various drawings and texts from Lilin, and other townspeople who were long gone. Among these items, however, was a small, leather-bound notebook that read "Thoughts" on the front. Only the few first pages were written in; the back half would be a few sneaked-in drawings by Lilin.
2E 586
Vulkwasten, Cormount. Now we're in Shattered Grove. Back home, for me. I can't help but wonder why people follow me everywhere. I never wanted to be a leader, and yet, here I am. Booze-free, and ready to get a guard going once more. I told myself I'd clean up for Lilin. If I break that promise again, I don't know what I'll do with myself.
We made it out of Vulkwasten with barely anything on our backs. Cormount almost took us. But, why? I pray to Mara, only for the safety of Lilin. Only for the safety of my little girl. I've murdered innocent people, and I've sacrificed others for my own well-being. And for hers. I do not envy it, but it is all I know. I wish I knew more, but I suppose we can't know how the future is going to pan out.
I used to tell Narkses how I wanted to sail to Summerset, and join the House of Reveries, there. Told him I'd stage my death and head out for the sparkling shores of their welcoming arms. Then I got Narkses killed. On a 'vacation.' An adventuring party. My twenties were filled with stupid decisions. His blood is, and forever will, be on my hands.
I will take so many secrets with me to the grave. All because I couldn't open up to anyone. All because I couldn't bear to find a place in my heart, to welcome someone in. I want to go home. I want to be a child. I want to do marathons from one side of the island to the other, and I want to play with my siblings. I want to come home late, after missing dinner, and sneak back into my room through the trellis before anyone can see me. I want to love. But I hurt people in my wake like a hurricane hitting the island at full force. I destroy anything in my path like a torrential wave, hellbent on destruction. I am a nightmare. A woman that became too jaded to love, even when people begged me to. I stay here, because it gives me a chance to try and love again.
I can see the island on the shore, and I think Fedris just shouted something. Or was that the Altmer beside him? Damned fools. I'm glad they came with us.
Well. Shattered Grove awaits.
Home.
There is a small fingerprint on the bottom of the page, as though a child had accidentally smeared ink on it.
2E 586
Vulkwasten, Cormount. Now we're in Shattered Grove. Back home, for me. I can't help but wonder why people follow me everywhere. I never wanted to be a leader, and yet, here I am. Booze-free, and ready to get a guard going once more. I told myself I'd clean up for Lilin. If I break that promise again, I don't know what I'll do with myself.
We made it out of Vulkwasten with barely anything on our backs. Cormount almost took us. But, why? I pray to Mara, only for the safety of Lilin. Only for the safety of my little girl. I've murdered innocent people, and I've sacrificed others for my own well-being. And for hers. I do not envy it, but it is all I know. I wish I knew more, but I suppose we can't know how the future is going to pan out.
I used to tell Narkses how I wanted to sail to Summerset, and join the House of Reveries, there. Told him I'd stage my death and head out for the sparkling shores of their welcoming arms. Then I got Narkses killed. On a 'vacation.' An adventuring party. My twenties were filled with stupid decisions. His blood is, and forever will, be on my hands.
I will take so many secrets with me to the grave. All because I couldn't open up to anyone. All because I couldn't bear to find a place in my heart, to welcome someone in. I want to go home. I want to be a child. I want to do marathons from one side of the island to the other, and I want to play with my siblings. I want to come home late, after missing dinner, and sneak back into my room through the trellis before anyone can see me. I want to love. But I hurt people in my wake like a hurricane hitting the island at full force. I destroy anything in my path like a torrential wave, hellbent on destruction. I am a nightmare. A woman that became too jaded to love, even when people begged me to. I stay here, because it gives me a chance to try and love again.
I can see the island on the shore, and I think Fedris just shouted something. Or was that the Altmer beside him? Damned fools. I'm glad they came with us.
Well. Shattered Grove awaits.
Home.
There is a small fingerprint on the bottom of the page, as though a child had accidentally smeared ink on it.